p.s.

The brownies were delicious by the way ;)

Waiting for my brownies to be done baking...

So, i'm sitting here watching Muppet Christmas Carol and waiting for my brownies to be done so I can eat their deliciousness, and i decided that it's time to write a blog...
This past week i've discovered how real Spiritual Warfare is. I mean, I've always known there's angels and demons and such but it seems like we forget it a lot. I don't know the exact quote but C.S Lewis wrote about this and said that Satan would rather have us not believe in him at all and not worry about him because that's when he can use us to get to ourselves.
I've always felt that people either forget about Satan or they give him too much credit for our failure. But, now i'm not so sure what I think. I mean, we need to take blame for our own mistakes but sometimes Satan does have a part in it. We definitely need to find a happy medium. Well, i wouldn't call it 'happy' but, you know what I mean ;)
I'm not real comfortable writing down all the details of this experience but, I feel like Satan has had a pull on me this past year. I've had my spiritual ups and downs but definitely more downs this year. I always blamed myself for being so angry and miserable about things but my dad brought to my attention that the things i had been saying to myself didn't make sense at all. I wasn't saying "i'm not good enough for this" I was saying "You're not good enough for this". Now, what on earth? I never really paid attention to it. No, it doesn't make sense that I would talk to myself in second person.
I constantly felt that something was wrong. I could never focus on the good, only the bad. I'm a pretty optimistic person but things had changed and I was down in the dumps ALL the time. Depressed really. And now it's really scary to know that something was talking to me. It's real.

Well, I plan to write more on this subject later but i'm gonna leave it for now. Plus, my brownies are done;)